First Steps: Where and When to Make your First Post on Birchwood Isle

Birchwood Isle is growing rapidly (which is great!). This means that I've been sending out a lot of messages to welcome new members to the group and to encourage them to get involved wherever they can. One thing I've found in doing this is that the people playing adult characters are often the most nervous and worried about how to start, or whether or not they are needed.

First of all, let me reassure you: We always need adults. On an individual level, nearly every child or teen in the group is looking forward to interacting with an adult, but new adults can sometimes have a hard time getting a child or teen to post with them. Unfortunately, this often results in the nasty side effect of giving the adult player the impression that they are not needed or wanted. This alienation of adult players may result in losing them.

Fortunately, there are things that adults posting can do to make the transition easier for themselves and to increase the likelihood of getting a response from other members of the group. Please note that on Birchwood Isle that we guarantee to 90% that an open thread will receive a reply because if necessary, one of the administrators will take a thread that has waited past a certain amount of time.

1. Post your thread in a place where there will be other people. Our 10% margin of error in guaranteeing responses to open threads is that sometimes they are placed in areas that are private. For example, if you start a thread at your home, nobody is going to magically appear in your living room in order to reply to you. This is a real example of something we've seen in the past.
   
   Pro Tip: Go for public areas that would, logically, get a lot of foot traffic. On Birchwood Isle you may attract Teens and Adults by visiting any of the restaurants in town. Paying attention to board descriptions is helpful, as each one contains information about the types of characters most likely to frequent that area. Avoid shoppes, as they tend to be less busy. Children, Teens, and Adults may sometimes all be found in the community areas, such as parks and beaches. 
2. Make your thread active. The term "active" refers to a thread which provides the potential other player something to reply to. For example, you might post that "John tripped over a rock, his drink flying from his hand and landing all over the person who had been sitting on a bench nearby." Now this "person" (who is genderless and ageless) can react to being covered in soda. This is an "active" thread. More on this in another post.
   
   Pro Tip: Avoid defining the age or gender of the person who has bumped into your character, or who you tripped on, or who walked by you, or who just let a fart rip (whatever you want to do is fine, but be creative. "Bumping into somebody" is often over used!). This way you leave the thread open to a variety of different people and can explore role play with anyone who happens to want to play with you. Try not to cut yourself off in the first few posts you make on the board.
3. Communicate with the group. People are more likely to post with someone they have had time to become familiar with. When you chat in the cbox (or whatever method of communication is available in your group), you give the other members of the group a chance to get to know you. When two players are comfortable with one another, it's more likely that they will interact productively on the forum. It doesn't take much, just a friendly face in the cbox.
   
   Pro Tip: Most of us welcome a personal message sent to us about plotting with other people. It is wholly appropriate to contact someone to ask if they want to do a thread with you. In fact, if you're more comfortable plotting out your first thread, then be our guest! Our members are generally always looking for more interactions themselves, and would love to talk to you about what you want to play. Just send a message!
4. Respect limits. One of the things that child and teen players are most worried about, when entering into a thread with a new adult, is whether or not that adult is going to nit-pick their behavior and look for reasons to punish them. While many of them are here specifically to be spanked, they may be shy about entering a thread that may result in an adult wishing to spank them without first getting to know them.
   
   Pro Tip: Be friendly and open, and make sure that you're only posting for your character. If you state what a child or teen is doing or wearing, you risk them feeling trapped into a misbehavior that they didn't intend. Remember that they are fully capable of describing their own behavior, and that you can't punish them for something they didn't do. In fact, on Birchwood Isle, unless you're a guardian or they're your child, you can't punish them at all.
5. Be patient and keep trying. If for some reason your first thread doesn't get any attention, or your role play partner abandons it, or you don't get the age group or gender that you prefer, be patient. We recommend moving forward with the thread in as much as you can, and not dropping the "wrong" characters, since willingness to persevere tends to draw more of the right characters to you in the long run. You can always make a new thread. Adults are allowed as many as they want.
   
   Pro Tip: If you prefer a specific age or gender to join your thread, take the time to make a note on the thread that you want to interact with children, or adults, or teens. This is the best way to make sure that you get the "right" gender. Please don't be afraid, however, of engaging in peer relationships, as adult peer relationships can be amazing for both people involved in them.

I hope that these tips have helped you, at least a little bit. If you are having any problems, please feel free to ask in the comments!

Top Tips: How to Find an Adoptive Family for Your Inner Kid

Whether you're new to the age play community or you've been a part of it for many years, the same pressing question bothers most bottoms: How do I find a family for my inner kid? 

While this article is geared toward members of Birchwood Isle (in conjunction with the original posting if our adoption policies), it applies to anyone in the ageplay community who is looking to find a family for their inner kid. These tips should work whether you are trying to be part of a biological family or trying to get adopted in a foster care group.

Members of Birchwood Isle are asked to please read this thoroughly and keep these tips in mind. Potential players will of course be interested in what this has to say, but I wish for people in both groups to understand this first and foremost: We're going to find a family for your inner kid, if you work with us. Unless you fight us every step of the way, or don't want your inner kid to be adopted, we will find an adoptive family for you.

1. Don't ask someone to adopt you. I know that this is incredibly difficult for most people, but when you ask someone to adopt you, you apply pressure to them to say "yes," even if they aren't comfortable making that commitment.
   
   
   Pro Tip: Instead of asking someone to adopt you, open a dialog with them. Ask them what they're looking for in a child they might want to adopt, ask about their discipline policies, and invite them to talk to you about what they want. When you make it about them and not about you, you get better results.
   
   
2. Avoid bratty behavior. While we acknowledge that most of our members are eager to get punished (since that's one of the main themes of our game), bratty behavior (such as hiding out to smoke pot, or running away from home, or shouting obscenities at random) makes your inner kid less desirable, and potential parents are less likely to adopt children who they see as "bratty."
   
   
   Pro Tip: Instead of acting out with the deliberate intention of getting in trouble, try some natural behaviors. A young child is generally less likely to be disrespectful toward adults than a teenager is, but may talk back when she hears something she doesn't like. A little boy is more likely to leave the grounds because he's chasing a rabbit than he is to leave because he's angry with his foster parents. Make the behavior make sense, if you want to get adopted! 

   
   
3. Post a lot. This should go without saying, and our "one thread per kid at a time" rule may make this seemingly difficult, but in any group you encounter, you should be able to post frequently and broadly. Don't just post with adults, find peers to role play with, learn to enjoy different combinations of characters. Play with characters of both sexes, maybe try non-binary genders, kids, teens, adults, teachers, social workers, therapists and other caretakers. Show off how great your kid is so that people will want to adopt him.
   
   

   Pro Tip: Threads between two children often lead to disciplinary measures needing to take place because they often degenerate. This is a natural way to get the spanking you came to the group for in the first place, without appearing bratty. Taking time to get to know other kids could ultimately get you the very thing you first wanted from your roleplay partner, so you wind up killing two birds with one stone! Even better, adults reading threads looking for kids to adopt will see how friendly your inner kid is and may want to adopt him!
   
   
4. Attend site events. This might mostly apply to Birchwood Isle, but if your group has events, the same thing works: Go to the events. Post in them. Make yourself available to the adults who may be looking to adopt. 
   
   

   Pro Tip: Talk to a number of adults at events, if available. Don't focus only on the one that you're already determined that you want. Try not to misbehave and to get in trouble at these events, as punishment is time consuming and disruptive and doesn't allow you to make the most of the time you have. Our events only last one month, so that time is limited.
   
   
5. Be patient. I know that this is hard. When I introduce a new inner kid character, I'm already ready to see that character get adopted into a loving family. It's not always possible for a child to be adopted straight away in a group, so you have to be patient.
   
   

   Pro Tip: Make the most of the time that you spend waiting, by making friends and maybe enemies, and getting to know what all the site has to offer. Every site should have something incredible to offer you as a player, and you can use this time wisely to get to know the group.

4 Reasons to We Promote "Relationships First" at Birchwood Isle Spanking Roleplay

Birchwood Isle is different than most typical "ageplay" roleplaying groups you've probably encountered. Some groups allow their inner child members to act out and get spanked immediately, then move on to the next misbehavior and the next punishment. We refer to this as "bratting" (yes, a verb), or as "being a brat." The problem with this wording is that it doesn't matter how terrible the bratty behavior is the person playing the brat doesn't see the behavior as bratty. Believe me, I've seen this time and again, and there's nothing more infuriating than telling somebody to please stop attention-seeking only to have to clean up the pieces of a wounded player who didn't think they were doing anything wrong.

So we've dispensed with this impractical language. Spanking role plays are always going to have their fair share of people who want nothing more than to get to their next spanking -- and quickly. Hey, I get it! I like having my characters get spanked by my role play partners too. I'd be lying if I told you I had no interest in punishment in the role play.

Instead of discouraging bratty behavior, we've started to encourage our members to focus on the relationships that their characters are building through the spanking role play. We do this for some very specific reasons, and it's getting us great results from our players. Why? 

Let's talk about it!

1. The punishments you get from a character (adult) who cares about you are a million times better than being punished by a character who doesn't like you. Many age players enter into a group hoping to get spanked soon after (or even during!) their arrival post. At this point, your roleplay partner (and their character) hasn't had enough time to get to know you and to become invested in making the thread good for you. In fact, intimate physical contact with your character may feel inappropriate to your partner.
2. Some players are uncomfortable punishing somebody they haven't gotten to know yet. Remember when you first joined a group and you were nervous about making mistakes or getting it wrong? The person playing your adult probably feels similarly, and doesn't want to jump right into a thread where they have to punish. Taking the time to get to know the other character eases this tension a bit and builds trust.
3. A strong relationship provides a better chance of "successful" discipline for both the adult and the child characters. If the goal of a punishment is to get through it so that you can move on to the next punishment and get spanked again, then you're getting into trouble for the wrong reasons and you're not enjoying those spankings as much as you think you are. A strong bond means it's more likely that you won't rebound into another quick fix.
4. Adults are more likely to cuddle children they've bonded with, and nearly everybody wants to be cuddled after a spanking. The majority of people who come to Birchwood Isle want to be spanked -- and provided with the cursory after care when the punishment is over. It can be awkward for an adult to provide physical comfort to a child they don't know well and don't have feelings for. A bond ensures that the adult is more apt to provide that comfort.

Is going from one quickie to the next easier than building relationships for you? Or do you prefer to put the time into bonding with your partner? Have you ever seen the benefits of taking your time?

New Beginnings Activity Night

It's the time of year for ghosts and goblins, and spooks galore! New Beginnings is getting in the mood with its October Activity Night! 

This month, join the children of New Beginnings to carve pumpkins in the kitchen and dining room. Children are paired up at random, with late-comers being added to existed pairings as they arrive in the group and sign up for the activity.

Every month, the Birchwood Isle ageplay and spanking roleplaying group hosts activity nights for the children of New Beginnings. This is a unique way that we encourage our members to participate with one another and to step outside of their comfort zone by playing with characters they may not otherwise get a chance to experience. All foster children are invited to join in the experience and in the fun!

Come join us!